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Movie Review: Halloween Ii

Prinz Lee image

Prinz Lee wrote this review 6 years and 4 months ago

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Written August 28, 09

I really don’t know what happened here. But as the saying goes “you can’t win them all” and therefore feel this has to be Rob Zombie’s first jumped-the-shark moment. His refusal to do a second one (but having bent due to studio pressure and for the purpose of insecurity to not allow anyone else destroy his original) should have been passed on. I’ll tell you why… because he wouldn’t have had to carry such a burden of guilt after this release. I mean I can’t really answer for the man but all of his creations from music to films have been on point. Sure a bit surreal and over-the-top, but for the most part his creativity always stood firm and strong. H2 seemed to have been rushed and totally disregarded for any kind of continuity. Think of going nuts writing an email or letter and not spell-checking or connecting one paragraph to the next based on story. This was chopped up in many ways and although some (and I’ll say some with a capital ‘S’)… Some scenes worked based on how they were shot… the rest really took a turn somewhere else.I wish I could have some kind of am idea as to where or what he was trying to tap into, but I don’t. All in all this was very disappointing and I don’t know where he’ll go from here, however; I do say whatever move comes next needs some redemption.

For reasons of letting my film emotions and enthusiasms down, I’m going to repay him and the studio by releasing some spoilers, so if you care stop reading, if not, continue…

Firstly, did Zombie forget he was working on Michael Meyers and not Jason? I mention Jason because just like Friday the 13th, Michael’s motives to seek out his sister and unite them as a family, steers from visions and voices from his mother (Sherri Moon-Zombie). I can understand Rob wanting to give M.M. a justifiable reason and to an extent it can work, because truth be told, it was something we NEVER SAW in any of the original Halloween films, but it was just a bit too obvious and it bugged me a lot.

Secondly, a downfall of the movie was definitely how Rob decided to use a different actor as kid Michael Meyers. The kid did not look as evil and was definitely not as good of an actor as (Daeg Faerch) from the 1st one.

Thirdly, the only thing I felt worked well was the first 15 minutes of the film. You’re completely lured into believing that Rob Zombie is picking-up exactly where his first installment ended and is not going to let the tension up one bit. A brilliant sequence ensues in a hospital. It’s gripping, well-shot and terrifying. It hits the benchmark of great horror film cat-n-mouse style chase scenes. It’s nothing revolutionary, but it sure was exciting and very well-executed. Sadly…wait for it…guess what?!? IT WAS ALL A DREAM! Yes, the beginning of the film is not a continuation of the first, but rather the recurring nightmare of a weary, battle-scarred Laurie Strode. From there the film descends into a mixture of tired old horror movie clichés and a really awful performance by Malcolm MacDowell who I felt did a much better job in the first one and made it a bit painful to continue watching.

The movie ends up being a really bad parody of the Halloween series. It splits it’s time evenly between the stories of a traumatized Laurie Strode (played well by Scout Taylor-Compton). She’s grown as an actress since the last film, a diva-like Dr. Loomis (Malcolm MacDowell - cashing-in on the whole Michael Myers craze by peddling a seedy, tell-all book) and of course Myers himself (living as a wild-man out in the wilderness; having hallucinations of Rob Zombie’s wife and himself as a boy in that infamous clown mask). Cutting to the chase, the movie is just silly.

If you’re not convinced, allow me to give you undisputable evidence of the movie’s awfulness. There is actually a Letterman-style talk show sequence in the movie featuring Dr. Sam Loomis as a guest, trading quips with WEIRD AL YANKOVICH (playing himself, of course). That’s how bad the movie is. It’s not Halloween’s more like Scary Movie II!!! The film is just a great beginning and a cheap, anti-climatic ending; with some over-the-top, predictable, ludicrous filler in-between. And that is what a lot of horror and exploitation films are, isn’t it? Well yes, but this movie thinks it’s smarter then that…it thinks its better. It’s just not. The arrogance with what the films expectations of itself, versus what it actually delivers is utterly insulting to the audience. What that said…I felt the franchise hit its lowest point EVER during the talk show segment with Weird Al. He asks Dr. Loomis if his book is about “the Austin Powers Guy”. Someone call the Wayans brothers! I think Rob Zombie stole their script!

Rob, WTF happened?



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