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Movie Review: Race To Witch Mountain

Prinz Lee image

Prinz Lee wrote this review 6 years and 5 months ago

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PL's Archive: Written March 28, 2009

A generic action adventure movie suited for kids with the attention span of a chipmunk.

Jack Bruno (Dwayne Johnson) is an ex criminal who drives a cab for a living in Las Vegas. We don't have much background info on Jack except that he used to be a driver for an organized crime unit and they're always trying to get him back into the organization but he wants nothing to do with them. At the same time, a UFO lands, alerting that branch of the government who can only wear black suits and uses the most incredible locating technology to zero in on the aliens who abandoned their crashed ship. We're also introduced to Dr. Alex Friedman (Carla Gugino), who is speaking at a nearby UFO convention that is conveniently taking place at the same time. After getting rid of the two muscle guys sent to get Jack back into the crime family, Jack takes off in his cab only to notice he now has two unwanted passengers by the names of Sara (Anna Sophia Robb) and Seth (Alexander Ludwig). The government finds out these two kids, who are the aliens from the ship, are now in the back of this taxi cab and go to pursue them. Why is all of this in one paragraph? …Because all of this shit happens in the first fifteen minutes of the movie…. So much for character building…

So now the chase is on. And for the rest of the movie, you're gonna have to sit through it. We really know nothing about the two kids. They're so robotic and lifeless that you don't give a shit about them either. Sara keeps calling Jack by his full name and Seth just sits there like his jeans are stapled to the back seat. The two have no personality and even though they form a friendship with Jack over the course of the movie, you end up not caring. Dwayne Johnson is always fun to watch on screen but he really doesn't have much to work with here. I wish this guy would go back to doing action movies for adults. Right now I smell what The Rock is cooking, and it smells like new paper from a freshly printed Disney check every time he makes a film for them. And I say that with the utmost respect seeing as it’s pretty clear Disney might have tapped him to be their new adventure golden boy. The success of “Game Plan” and perhaps “Race to witch mountain” there’s no doubt another’s in the works.

Race to WitchMountain is a disappointment but I think kids will enjoy it. It won't be remembered as a classic like the originals are because it's just another mindless action-adventure movie for the young ones with no heart and no soul. I'm not down on future Disney remakes because I love Disney and their products so much, but they need to take their time with the script and write interesting material for future remakes. If they can't, then I hope the next time they step into the vault they accidentally lock themselves




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